The Aloha Hash House Harriers

welcome you to hashing in Paradise!

(Borrowed from the Bicester H3 but modified extensively by long-time Aloha hasher Chest Checker and formatted for the website by Thighmaster.)

Responsibilities of the Hares

The hares, of course, determine the start and end of the trail as well as how the pack gets from the start to the end. They also provide a vehicle (fondly referred to as the "B-van") to carry hasher's bags and a driver for the beer wagon if it is an A to B trail. The B should be no further than a mile from the A in order to facilitate car runs (to be initiated by the hares). Upon presentation of receipt(s), the hares will be reimbursed up to $40 for any beer checks they provide on trail. The hares also determine the location for the party to continue after the circle adjourns (referred to as "on on on" or "on afters"). The hares can also create a theme for the hash and request that hashers wear certain attire (such as a red dress or a goofy hat) or bring some specific items (such as a potluck dish or something to grill). The hares might also ask you to bring something you'll need for the trail (such as a flashlight for trails that include a tunnel). All the pertinent information (start location, directions to the start, turkey/eagle options, theme, attire and/or items for each hasher to bring, location of the on afters, and a point of contact and phone number for questions) needs to be provided to the Webmaster and/or Hash Announce (currently ) no later than the Wednesday prior to the Saturday of the hash.

Hares should be honest regarding trail difficulty when there are harder than "normal" conditions. Hares should provide experience-based descriptions of their trails (i.e., swimming required, rope climbing, tunnels, etc.). Hares need to account for wankers who go on trail as best as they can. Hares must SWEEP THEIR TRAILS and/or ensure all hashers are in before they leave the area themselves. However, hares should NOT put themselves (nor others) at serious risk for the sake of finding "lost" hashers who have deliberately chosen not to follow trail marks. If necessary, hares should coordinate a search and/or contact public officials (police, search and rescue, etc.).

Rules, Rules, Rules

It's been said that the only rule of the Hash is that there are no rules. But of course, to just about every rule, there are exceptions. And we actually do have just a few little rules which help the running of the Hash go smoothly.

Hares: The hares get to hash free . . . as long as there are no more than 3 of them. If more than 3 hares are needed to set a trail then it is probably too complicated anyway. One of the hares might be a "mystery" hare. A mystery hare is a hare known only to the hares and does not take off with the rest of the hares. The mystery hare takes off with the pack and at some point sneaks away to lay some part of the trail. The identity of the mystery hare is revealed only at the on home (unless the mystery hare screws up and is caught sneaking away and/or laying trail).

Distance: 4 to 6 miles. In general, we're talking about two trails, the Turkey and the Eagle. We have a fair number of walkers and Hashers with strollers for the Turkey Trail and macho types for the Eagle Trail. Ideally, they should end their respective trails at about the same time. Thus, a somewhat shorter (3 to 4 miles) Turkey Trail is called for. Also, the first Saturday of every month is the Aloha H3's "family hash" day and a strollerable turkey (or family) trail is traditionally provided.

Distance from A to B: The Aloha Hash usually runs an A to B Hash. The Harriers don't know where the finish (B) is unless they follow the trail. The best finish is located within one mile of the start (A) in case we don't have enough cars for the shuttle back to the start. If you plan a run in which the driving distance from B back to A is long (such as from the top of Tantalus to Manoa Falls in Manoa Valley, please pre-position a few cars at the B, even if it means telling a few Hashers (sworn to secrecy) where the B is.

Trail Difficulty/Hazards: Hares have their responsibilities (as outlined earlier in this treatise), but the pack members should also bear some of the burden. Personal responsibility IS A MUST . . . its NOT ALL ON THE HARES!! If in doubt about your abilities, don't run the trail. Parents are ultimately responsible for their kids. Hashers MUST bring a whistle (or cell phone, etc) if they are really concerned and want to increase their chance of being found should they get lost.

Beer Checks: The hares can provide one or more refreshment stops (aka beer checks) on trail. A single beer check is usually placed at about the midway point of the trail. If there are both turkey and eagle trails and there is only one beer check then it will usually be on the eagle trail. There is usually also water provided at the beer check. Additional beer checks can be provided, but the hares will only be reimbursed up to $40 for whatever beer, water, ice, and/or other beverages they provide. (No, the hares are not reimbursed for trail setting materials, such as flour, chalk, ribbon, toilet paper, etc.)

When You're On, You're On.

OK. We all know that the Hash begins with the sounding of the horn or whistle. And, we also know that this usually results in about 20% of the Hash taking off and wandering around aimlessly in circles (at least this is the way it appears to the other 80%). Of course this apparent chaos is, in fact, a concerted somewhat unscientific effort by the few, in service to the many, to find the correct trail. The Aloha H3 walks for the first three minutes and then begins running. Hashers running earlier are subject to a penalty.

If a Hasher finds three consecutive On Ons along a trail, road, gap, field or whatever then he is on the right route and, in Hash parlance, this is known as being ON.

As long as an additional On On can be found along the same route then he continues to be ON. Now it's the job of the Hares, those unmentionables that set the trail, to screw up the runners and keep the whole group together. They may do this by simply taking a turn and hope that you miss it, or they may use a number of weapons in their arsenal.

An Arsenal Of Weapons:

The ON ON  OR  (two toots of your whistle). The Hare uses an arrow or a dollop of flour to indicate a trail. However, this tail may not necessarily be the right one. A Hare can attempt to throw you off trail be leaving a couple of these marks followed by a False Tail mark (see below).

The Pack Mark (one toot of your whistle). This is NOT a mark that the Hare leaves. Rather, Hashers on trail frequently leave a mark that somehow represents their Hash Name (such as Joy Stick in this example). These are very helpful to the following Pack when they are "correct". However, be aware that the Hasher who left it may have been on a bad trail. It is Hash courtesy for the Hasher who left this mark to return and mark through it if their trail was wrong. However, this doesn't always happen.

The True Trail (three toots of your whistle). The Hare periodically uses an arrow with three lines through it to indicate the True Trail. This truly means that you are on the correct path. Only the Hare can use this mark. If you find a True Trail mark off of a Check, you can be assured that you are on the correct path. Any Hare who lays a True Trail mark in the midst of a False Trail should be stripped immediately!

The Check  OR (also called Intersection). The main purpose of a check is to slow down the FRB's (Front Running Bitches/Bastards) and allow the slower Hashers a chance to catch up. Checks, as indicated by a circle of flour with an X inside, are usually placed at a point along the route where there are intersecting trails or roads. At this point your trail of On Ons will cease to exist and it's the job of the Hashers to spread out and find the new route, otherwise known as checking. You may find no On Ons, one or two On Ons, Pack Marks, or a False Trail sign. However, only one direction can have 3 or more On Ons (except for a YBF which can have many On Ons before you reach it) and, of course, this one is now ON. The Check is also considered to be a true trail mark, so you can be assured that you have been on the true trail up to the Check.

The False Trail  OR  OR  (One long toot of your whistle). False Trails (Bad Trails) are marked with three parallel lines (|||), or one of the other pictured marks, blocking your path . It's really only acceptable for the Hare to use these marks. If you come across one of these, you need to return to the last Check and look for another trail. Hashers are not allowed to proceed beyond a False Trail mark. You must turn around and go back the way you came.

The Singapore Back Check (SBC - sometimes just called a Back Check)  OR    (One long toot of your whistle and yell SBC!) A Singapore Back Check is similar to the ||| except that you don't have to ruturn to the last Check to look for the true trail. The true trail can be anywhere between the SBC and either the last Check or the last True Trail mark (whichever cums first). The Back Check is one of the more frustrating variations on a check. Remember, this is where you have a Check but the proper route is behind you rather than in front.
 

The Map (not pictured). A map is sometimes drawn where it would be impractical to place flour or chalk marks . . . or when the hares would like to frustrate any SCB's (Short-Cutting Bitches/Bastards). The hares will draw a map of the upcumming terrain with arrows on the map to show the correct route. Follows these arrows just as you would if the hare had put them directly on the trail.

The No Blow Zone (not pictured). Sometimes there will be areas on trail where it's either not polite (such as a Hospital Zone) or not prudent (such a a field where there's a bull nearby) to blow one's whistle. The hares will mark this area using the letters NBZ. At the start of the area you'll see "Begin NBZ" and then eventually you'll see "End NBZ" when it's OK to use your whistle again.

The Beer Check  OR (preferably) . A well-laid trail usually has at least one beer check. The beer is typically somewhat hidden from obvious public view but should be found with a little Hash diligence whenever one of these signs is seen. Important note: The letters BC or BVC can also be used, however, to indicate that the trail ahead is dangerous. In this case BC would stand for Be Careful and BVC would stand for Be Very Careful. Please do use BVC or even BVFC (Be Very Fucking Careful) when the trail warrants it so that the hounds do not unknowingly risk life or limb.

The BEER NEAR  (three toots of your whistle and yell BEER NEAR!). This is the most welcome sign in Hashing! Typically this mark is laid within at least 1/4 mile of the on-home (finish) and usually closer than that!
 
 

Calling (or Is Anybody Home?)

The Hash relies on calling. We sometimes have the Hash Horn (usually Pancho), whose job is to stay in the middle of the pack and act as a beacon, but the whole thing falls apart if we don't call. Everyone should participate in calling ON ON at the ON ONs or using the whistle. This includes all Hashers, from the front runners to the last of the bunch.

The Calls of the Wild

"ARE YOU?" - This is the only call that is a question. And, because we're a somewhat simple-minded group, it's the only question that we ever ask. All other calls are a response to the question, "ARE YOU?"

"ON-ON!" - Music to a Hasher's ear. This is the correct response if you are on the right trail. In addition, when already on the right trail, Hashers should call "ON ON!" each and every time they come across an additional dot of flour. It's important that all hashers call the ON - it's our primitive communication system that alerts everyone down the line the proper way to go.

"CHECKING!" - When you approach a check, or if you are checking and have not yet found any trail marks, you should call this loud and clear.

"ON ONE!" - Call this when you are checking and you find one On On or if you're checking and someone else calls to you "ARE YOU?" and you've found one On On.

"ON TWO!" - Call this when you are checking and you've found two On Ons and if you're checking and someone else calls to you "ARE YOU?" and you've found two On Ons.

"ON THREE!" - Call this when you are checking and you've found three On Ons and if you're checking and someone else calls to you "ARE YOU?" and you've found three On Ons. Three On Ons after a Check mark should indicate a True Trail, unless you reach a YBF (a longer version of the False Trail), or if the Hare totally screwed up (in which case, s/he will drink for it!).

"LOOKING!" - If you're looking for On On, but are not at a Check, then the proper response is "LOOKING!"

"TRUE TRAIL!" - Call this when see a True Trail arrow. Now you know you've found the real trail and can feel confident continuing in the direction of the arrow, unless you reach an SBC (darn those wascally wabbits!), or if the Hare totally screwed up (in which case, s/he will drink for it!).

"ON-IN!" or "ON HOME!"- Call this when you see the ON-IN or ON-HOME written on the ground. This means you have reached the finish...and the beer!

"BEER NEAR!"- Call this when you see the BEER NEAR written on the ground. The finish should be within 1/4 mile when you find a BEER NEAR.

"YES, R.A.!" - This is the proper response to anything our beloved Religious Advisor might ask of you. Penalties for creative answers might range from an ice cold shirt to a free drink. Good luck!

Want to sign up to hare? View the Aloha H3 Calendar to see who's haring what upcoming Aloha H3 run and what dates are still open to sign up to hare! Select a date to hare and then e-mail Hana Ho, our Hare Raiser.

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